Motel Kumania

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Hi, I'm Jonny Nazhi, one of Kuma's brothers. Believe it or not, I just learned how to use a computer about a month ago! Well, anyway, here's my life story: Basically, I was adopted into the Nazhi family. I thank God every day for it, too! You see, in my previous family, I was beaten and abused from day to day. I was highly unwanted. After my fifteenth birthday, they kicked me out, and I had to find a new place to live. About three months ago, the I quietly opened the door to the teepee mansion of the Nazhi's an Indian family from the Kumanian tribe, and crept into the room of a seventeen year old Indian boy, named Kuma Juan Nazhi. The time in India was 2:00 (2:00AM), everyone was asleep. I gently touched Kuma's shoulder, waking him. I was afraid he'd scream and alert the family that someone had broken into the mansion, but instead, he simply asked who I was, gave me a hug, getting covered in the mud that was all over my naked, beaten body, and kissed me on both cheeks, a Kumanian sign of care and affection. "Welcome to the family," he whispered, and then he let me crawl into bed next to him, and we both fell asleep. That was the first time I ever truly slept without either being woken up by pain, or getting beaten awake. It felt so good!!! When finally woke up around 13:00 (1:00PM), Kuma had told the whole family about me, and they all naturally, kindly, and lovingly, accepted my presence. They all kissed and hugged me and welcomed me into their tribe. They showed me around their HUGE mansion. Kuma showed me his 40 foot tall dad, whose small intestine had uncoiled about a year before my arrival. I think it's funny that our mom is still of a normal height. When Dad saw me, he picked me up, but it was nowhere near the normal way. He sat down, put a HUGE hand on the floor, and told me to hop on. I got comfy in his palm, and he lifted me up to his lips to kiss me. It felt both great, and awkward. I'm used to it now, though. My favorite part about Dad is that he can swim faster than any motor boat or ship! He takes us all out for joyrides on his back in the river, not far from our mansion. And, during the summer, we all go to the Indian Ocean, and he's the surfboard! Of, course, he doesn't flip over as easily, so he intentionally does it, and we all laugh. Oh, yeah, and the first thing I did on the morning I arrived, after waking up, was take a nice, hot, soothing, healing shower! I had never gotten to take one before, because my old parents, if they're even worthy of that title, made me bathe in a creek. Taking a shower, with indoor plumbing instead of rain, felt so nice, I almost fell asleep again, because it was so relaxing! I love living in India. I'm even learning how to speak Kumanian, the language the tribe speaks, and I'm loving the Indian ceremonies! Yesterday, July 27th 2011, was Mokcqa Appointment Day. The Mokcqa is like a president, he rules the tribe. The only difference is that the Mokcqa tends to people's everyday needs, gives to others, and sets the laws fairly and immediately! I guess he or she is hardly like a president at all; the only similarity is that the Mokcqa serves for four years. Other than that, Mokcqatanqi (the state of being the Mokcqa) is so unlike presidency that the new Mokcqa is chosen by the last Mokcqa, a term can last for as long as a Mokcqa wishes (unless the current Mokcqa is killed or fired), and any random member of the tribe can be appointed as the Mokcqa, as long as he or she is fifteen or older! It's so cool!!! You don't even have to go through special classes to become the Mokcqa!!!!! Anyway, yesterday was Mokcqa Appointment Day, and guess who got appointed... Kuma, did!!!!!!!!!! So now, he's the ruler of the entire Kumanian tribe, and HE'S ONLY SEVENTEEN!!!!! The only rule that applies directly after appointment is that you can't make your first act of power until after your first week of Mokcqatanqi. You see, the first week is where all of the Kumanian tribe celebrates, with music, dance, and romance!!! It's so cool!!!!! My lifelong goal is to become the Mokcqa some day!!!!!!!!!! (Oh, one more thing: if you're wondering how I got to India, I stole my old father's credit card while he slept, and flew here! And I'm so glad I did, because I can just tell that my life will be EVER better, here with my new family!!!!!!!!!!)
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